Writers on Writers
Why is it writer weds writer?
Opposites attract, or so it’s said —
Venus and Mars.
Maybe it’s because only a writer
can understand
the fragile question,
“Want to read something I wrote?”
– from the archives
Writer on Writer
December 30th, 2009 Brent Posted in Wobbly Words No Comments »
TSS
March 31st, 2009 Brent Posted in Life Happens, Wobbly Words No Comments »
A study reported that children who play too much are 35% more likely than their more sedate counterparts to suffer from what scientists are calling toxic sock syndrome (TSS). TSS is characterized by a sulfuric sock odor, causing blurry vision, dizziness, nausea, vomiting, and in some cases, hallucination for anyone standing in a 10-foot radius. The recommended treatment is a full-body CDC Biolevel 4 decontamination along with disposing of the the socks in a plastic bag tied tight and thrown in the nearest outdoor trash can.
Wobbly words
March 13th, 2009 Brent Posted in Wobbly Words No Comments »
Lia has a unique way with words and is not afraid to use them once she knows the meaning. Her writing is comical but terse (she’s impatient).
Her speech is looser. She doesn’t always pay attention to meanings. Here’s the latest funny.
She had her Barbies all lined up ready to perform, a la American Idol. She needed someone to introduce each act. She ran to her room and grabbed her stuff tiger.
“Here’s Tigey,” she said. “He’s going to be the pronouncer.”
Aardvark Pride
December 18th, 2008 Brent Posted in Wobbly Words No Comments »
Lia took a Sesame Street break after a couple of hours of cleaning for Sparkly Thursday. She came back to the room singing, “I’m an art fart and I’m proud, I’m an art fart and I’m hap-py!”
(Revision: She corrected me today, it wasn’t “art fart, ” but “arf barf.” Please excuse me.)
Lost
July 3rd, 2008 Brent Posted in Wobbly Words No Comments »
Lia asked for more lotion for her arms. Suzanna asked her why.
Lia said, “I lost my lotion in my hands.”
Dress Code
June 21st, 2008 Suzanna Posted in Wobbly Words No Comments »
Lia’s school dress code doesn’t usually include shorts, but since the AC is not working in some classes and the temperature has been in the 90’s, they’ve made exceptions. Thank goodness, I thought I might have to sue them. Yesterday she dressed herself in plaid shorts and asked me if I knew where her perfect matching top was. When I asked her to describe it, she said, “It’s pink with jewels and it’s a non-sleeve.”
Lia's Best Recipe
June 17th, 2008 Suzanna Posted in Wobbly Words No Comments »
With her Purplicious apron on, Lia instructed me on her “best recipe ever!” It’s carrots, a pinch of salt, tomato slices and lemon or “Carpatisl” for short (it tastes better than it sounds). She is learning fractions in class and so the recipe is sprinkled with them.
“You need to put lemonade juice in it.” (lemon juice)
“What if I don’t have a lemon?”
“Then you could use a… kiwi lime!” (key lime)
Wedgy
January 24th, 2007 Suzanna Posted in Life Happens, Wobbly Words No Comments »
| It is a truth universally acknowledged that the moment you do something for yourself, unreservedly and unabashedly for yourself (like get a makeover at the office by a spectacular makeup artist named Julie Ban), your mom falls spectacularly to pieces on the newly Pledged floor of her friend’s house. More specifically, she breaks her hip and wrist and is lying immovable in a pile on the floor of that said friend’s house. Yes, still a friend – even though my mother’s “life event” has adversely affected her enjoyment of life, in some ways her friend is still worse off because her life has not changed. You put those pieces together. Anyway, I think it is safe to say that I was the most fancily made up person in the ER that evening, probably that whole week. My mom liked it, though I can’t imagine she didn’t like much that evening, as heavily drugged with painkillers as she was.Lia uses her dad’s golf club as a cane and when asked what happened, she explains that it was because of the wedge. Either she means something fancy related to golfing (you never know) or she means wax+Pledge=wedge. She had heard the story told many times, “Somebody waxed the floor with Pledge…yeah…not smart…” and “wedge” is what came out. |
Getting Your Ideas Across
August 16th, 2006 Suzanna Posted in Wobbly Words No Comments »
Can you guess what is meant?
“I’m full of hands.”
“The water in my mouth went down the wrong throat.”
“Don’t take a peep.”
Little Bo Peep
July 11th, 2006 Brent Posted in Wobbly Words No Comments »
As most of you know, I have two 80% girls in my house – my wife and my daughter. At it’s worst, this condition creates minor confusion and a chuckle or two. At it’s best, however, it creates magical moments of absolute hilarity.
Remember the Little Bo Peep nursery rhyme? “Little Bo Peep has lost her sheep, and she doesn’t know where to find them. Leave them alone, and they’ll come home…” Well Lia had a eureka moment when she remembered how it all ended: “DRAGGING THEIR BUTTS BEHIND THEM!!!!”